In the clearing stands a boxer
And a fighter by his trade
And he carries a reminder
Of every glove that laid him down
Or cut him 'till he cried out
In his anger and his shame
"I am leaving, I am leaving"
But the fighter still remains
-Paul Simon
As 2011 begins, I am reminded of the importance of the fight. I know that everyone has causes near and dear to their hearts, so this isn't just about scleroderma. But, today I found myself thinking about my friends who have lost their fight against this disease, and I just wanted to acknowledge their fight and their impact, in the hope that the blows they threw will collectively result in a knockout in the not too distant future.
My new year's goal is to become a better fighter. I am going to become more active with the Scleroderma Foundation now that the bulk of my treatment is behind me. I have Bonnie as my muse. :) Today is her birthday, so she's on my mind, too.
Unfortunately, my main fight will be delayed by the warm up act: a (hopefully) brief third round against C. Diff. I knew this was coming, so it's no surprise, and quick action from my doctor has hopefully staved off the worst of it this time.
And my fight will enjoy many interruptions of the best kind, if 2011 goes my way. We head to the desert to watch the boys play tennis again this weekend, and hope to hit plenty of horse shows in the year ahead, too! But, I am looking forward to focusing much of my attention and time on the fight... that is after I find my brain and my ambition, both of which seemed to have taken a much needed (?) hiatus in 2010. For the record, it was my brain that made me type "much needed" in the prior sentence. When it acts, it acts on its own these days.
I had to look up "C Diff" and decided I was lucky I didn't know what that was. Sure hope it is a very brief stint! We're surely in this fight together, and I'm always as close as your phone if I can help in any way! Enjoy every minute with those beautiful boys. Looking back, I'm afraid I didn't savor each moment of my childrens' youth but I caught on by the time grandkids got here. So much to be thankful for and I hope 2011 is your healthiest in a long time! Big hugs, Bonnie
ReplyDeleteMy son, Paul, lost his fight with scleroderma on New Year's Day. He was 45. May you continue your fight and our prayers are with you. He had systemic diffuse scleroderma since 2004.
ReplyDeleteTo the previous poster... Cathy..... my heart goes out to you. The loss of your son is unthinkable, and I can't even imagine your pain as you now try to pick up your own life. It is for him, and for everyone else with this disease, that we all take a step closer to conquering it. I liked Holly's analogy... her blow by blow story. I am sure your son scored many many knockouts. Holly, feel better immediately. C Diff is not allowed. Enjoy your family and your horses, and especially nurture and savor that fighting spirit of yours!
ReplyDeleteCathy,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your post, and please know that I will keep you and your family in my prayers. You have my heartfelt sympathy.
Holly
You are already a winner, a champion, given what you've gone through. I know you will conquer in the future. The scleroderma has not taken away your great heart for others. Have a great 2011!!! Es
ReplyDelete